The Banff and Buchan Collection

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Tape 1994.028 transcription

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[Accordion playing. Applause.]

That wis marvellous. [background chat.]

[ES] We're going to play a few waltzes, it's a' auld waltzes like 'Rowan Tree'....

[faint; plays music; applause].

[ES] I didnae hear ye singin there, and I'm sure ye winna sing tae this een.

[laughs; plays music; applause; background chat; 04 plays music; applause]

[ES] Thank you very much, ??? dae a wee bittie talkin as well.

[ES] …When I tellt her, she laught and laught, and I really thocht she wis gan tae blinkin die in ma airms, so she's determined at I'm gan tae tell you eens is joke.
An Englishman, and a Scotsman and an Irishman working on a building site ye see. Ye ken at dennertime they'd tae go to their piece boxes, so the Englishman he says 'Look at is, bloody ham sandwiches again, fit dae mak o that', in his English voice mind! He says is 'Ken is, see if I've got ham sandwiches the morn, I'll mak a promise tae ye', he says, 'I'll jump aff this blinkin scaffoldin and tak ma ane life'.
     The Scotsman opens his piece box, cheese sandwiches. He says 'Well look whit I've gotten, cheese sandwiches, I get at every day'. He says, 'Well if you're gan tae tak your life, well if I get is the morn I'll tak my life and a. I'll mak a promise to you if I get cheese sandwiches I'm gan tae jump aff this scaffoldin and tak ma ane life'.
     So the Irishman he says, 'Well look whit I've got, pickle sandwiches' he says, 'if I get'. I canna spik in an Irish tongue, jist Buchan it disnae sound right! [laughs]. He says 'If I get pickle sandwiches the morn' he says, 'I'm tellin you I'm gan tae dae fit you eens is gan tae dae, I'm gan tae tak ma ane life an a, jump aff this scaffoldin'.
     So the next day, they are put tae work and dennertime comes, the Englishman opens his piece box, and sure enough it wis ham sandwiches. He says 'look at is, whit did I tell ye, ham sandwiches again. Right, he says, I'm gan tae jump aff this blinkin scaffoldin, kill masel. So he did it. [Laughs.]
So the Scotsman he opens his piece box and he sees that he's got cheese sandwiches, and he says, look at is, cheese sandwiches again. Well I'm gan tae tak my life, if the Englishman's daen it, I'm gan tae dae it an a, he says tae the Irishman, and he jumps aff the scaffoldin and kills himsel.
     So the Irishman's left on his own and he opens his piece box, and he sees his got pickle sandwiches again. And he's spikkin till himsel and he's sayin, well I had to mak a promise tae thae twa lads, if they've taken their life here's me wi pickle sandwiches again, I did promise them if I got pickle sandwiches I'd take ma ane life. So he jumps aff the scaffoldin and taks his ane life. So that's the three o them deid noo ye see.
     Three days efter at the funeral, the three wives are there, and they're a spikkin tae one anither, and the Englishman's wife says, 'Terrible tragedy this,' she says, 'If I'd only known he didnae like ham sandwiches, I wouldna have given them till him, but he didnae let on he didna like ham sandwiches.' So the Scotsman's wife she says, 'Well it's like my man,' she says, 'he never let on he didnae like cheese sandwiches, so I jist gave him the cheese sandwiches ye see.' And the Irishman's wife she turns round and she says, 'Well I canna figure my one out, I couldna figure my one out,' she says. 'He makes his ane bloody sandwiches!' [Laughs.]
     It wis his ane fault.

[background chat]

[ES] Is is jist a little sang, but it's a very sweet sang. It's ca'd 'The Gallant Forty-Twa,' and it's very very old, it's a very old sang, and a very old ??? and it's lang afore the regiments hid their names, like the Gordons and Black Watch, they a hid numbers eh, gan awa back hundreds o years ago and this song goes back before Napoleon times. And as ye ken, it wis a different world then that whit it is now, cause if ye hid something that might mean something tae ye, and you are your sweetheart wis parting, breaking up or something for a few years, like a girlfriend's boyfriend wis probably awa on the sea, a sailor, and it sometimes took seven year afore he come back, then they would part wi something that meant an affa lot to them. And an affa lot in them days wis a sixpence. And fit they would dae, they would halfen the sixpence, and one would tak half and the ither would tak the ither half and fan they got back the gither again, the sixpence, they would ken their lover by the sixpence. And this is fit this sang's aboot, it's an affa bonny sang. Oot o breath, I'm too fat tae sing that's fit it is.

O it's sax weeks come Sunday since ma laddie's gaen awa,
He's awa tae jine the regiment o the gallant forty-twa,
O broken hairted I've wandered ower the sake ma true love,
He's awa tae jine the regiment o the gallant forty-twa.

[break in tape]

[ES] A very special meaning to me, I like my song, I ??? one person, it's ma aunt Lucy. It's 'The Plooman Laddies' and it's jist a beautiful song. So if you've heard it before, or even heard me on the radio wi it, and you ken there's a wee bittie chorus come in, I hate sayin at, but there is. Eh come in because it is a bonny sang, I think Tom'll hiv tae come in.

'The Plooman Laddies'

Doon yonder den there's a plooman lad,
In some summer's day he'll be a my ain,
And sin laddie o and sin laddie aye,
The plooman laddies are a the go.

I love his teeth and I love his skin,
I love the very cairt he hurls in,
And sin laddie o and sin laddie aye,
The plooman laddies are a the go.

Doon yonder den I could a got a millert,
But the smell o dust wid hae deen me ill,
And sin laddie o and sin laddie aye,
The plooman laddies are a the go.

Doon yonder den I could a got a merchant,
But a' his things werena worth a groat,
And sin laddie o and sin laddie aye,
The plooman laddies are a the go.

I see him comin fae yonder toon,
Wi a his ribbons hingin roon and roon,
And sin laddie o and sin laddie aye,
The plooman laddies are a the go.

And noo she's gotten her plooman lad,
Is bare as ever he left the ploo,
And sin laddie o and sin laddie aye,
The plooman laddies are a the go.

And sin laddie o and sin laddie aye,
The plooman laddies are a the go.

A lovely song.


[ES] Is there nae still anybody wintin tae come up and gie us a sang.

[???] I'll gie ye a story Liz. A story I heard jist recently. And this boy wis affa hard up, and he thocht he'd invent something tae get a patent ye see. So he thocht, well there's a hell of a mess aboot the place so he dreamt up something at would kill the mice. So he rigged a plank like at ye see, aff the table and up like at ye see, and doon here wis anither plank, and a razor blade and a bit o cheese. And when the moosie come up here ye see, he sees the cheese and he jumps doon but the razor blade cuts his throat. [laughs] And he said this tae the lad tae get patented but, oh they werena keen on it ava, oh they werena keen. They said it wis cruel tae. If he could alter't they would mebbe accept it. So he said, well I'll keep is plank up like is ye see, and he said, I'd hae a hacksa blade bended at wey, nae cheese or naething like that though, and the moosie wid rin up here, look oot ower the edge, and says, [moving head back and forth] far the hell's the bloody cheese! [Laughs, applause.]

[General background chat, tuning up instruments.]

[Accordion and fiddle music; applause.]

[Accordion and fiddle music; applause.]

[Accordion and fiddle music; applause.]

[ES] Before I go, if anybody was interested I have a few tapes of me singin if ye want, god help ye, ye winna hae mice efter at. If ye wis interested in a tape. Hae a wee melody before we stop, and I'd jist like tae see I really enjoyed it the day super, and ony time ye want me back I'd be only too willin tae come back. [Applause; plays.]


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